One day after the glorious girls took on Les Gaillards in Chamonix, manfriend and I headed off to do something a little bit more challenging. The goal - to do a multipitch route on the Barberine crag near Vallorcine.
It was hot and fuelled with water and espresso, we packed super light knowing that it was going to be a challenge to just be in the glare of the Alpine sun, let alone having to climb 10 pitches of 6A-6B+ in the oppressive August heat.
As it was, we didn’t make it to the top. It wasn’t the heat that got the better of us but actually something far more humbling. A meltdown. Mine. Yuck.
I say yuck because I’m not used to emotional meltdowns generally in life and certainly not when I’m taking part in any kind of physical challenge or adventure. I’m a pretty level headed character at the best of time so my goodness it came as a shock when I suddenly found myself on the 5th pitch high above the valley and feeling like I was losing my mind.
The previous pitches had been difficult and scary but they were nothing in comparison to this one. It was overhanging, graded at 6a+ and requiring steep rock technique, enormous physicality and the need to move quickly over upwards so as to avoid totally burn out.
I am not used to this type of climbing, didn’t have a clue what the hell to do, was physically spent, and knew that I had to get to the top somehow in order for us to be able to get down safely. Cue tears. Lots of them. I felt lost, weak, out of my zone and completely incapable – as I said, yuck.
A combination of sheer will, lots of hauling by manfriend, and utter necessity meant that I made it to the hanging belay so that we could begin the long abseil off. On reflection, I should have known that it’d be a hostile route – the name ‘Viper Foot’ would indicate that things might be a touch spiky and dangerous, but my goodness, I never expected my reaction.
My confidence was in pieces and over the post crag beer in Chamonix I felt only disappointment – disappointment that we didn’t get to the top, disappointed that this was essentially due to me, and most importantly, disappointed in myself. Yuck.
So what am I going to do with this rather large vertical induced knock in confidence? Dr Chill Out might prescribe a few days away from the rock and perhaps for the next outing, something a little more suited to my style of climbing and perhaps something a little less hardcore.
I say sod it, I obviously need to work on the steep stuff so I’m going out tomorrow to do exactly that. The worst that can happen is that I’ll fall off a lot, and the best? Well, hopefully I’ll have a bigger repertoire of skills and techniques to draw upon next time I’m faced with yuck climbing. Oh and there’s always bigger biceps……..